My Heart Is Heavier Than The Crying Of The Sky

I can’t feel your presence any more
but it is peaceful here...when I think of you...I feel peaceful.

At the same time my heart is cut to threads
when I remember that not ever
ever again will I feel your kind hands upon my face.

I am confused, dazed, not sure of anything.
I feel free of all the earthly worries,
but the house is empty from you, so empty,
and in the silence you walk my dreams
in a long sad serene gown of white.

Life is still beautiful.
Right now death is peaceful.
I want to live
...but I am not scared of the unknown...

I want to shave my head.
I want to lose my sanity.
I want to mourn forever.
I want to break free of my body.

I want to hear your voice
and forget for this instant
that my soul has shattered
and lies in fragments upon the floor
where my tears collect in the shards,
pooled forever reflected in the image of you.

The candles are lit but the flowers are dying.
The house is empty from you, so empty,
and my heart is heavier than the crying of the sky.